


One Day At A Time: Welcome to Brooklyn

by Peralta_Garuntee (orphan_account)



Series: B99 Stories [1]
Category: Brooklyn Nine-Nine (TV), One Day at a Time (TV 2017)
Genre: Comedy, Crossover, Gen, Holidays
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-01-29
Updated: 2018-03-04
Packaged: 2019-03-11 03:30:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 4,253
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13515732
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/Peralta_Garuntee
Summary: The Alvarez's (and also Syd at Elena's insistence) take a much needed holiday to see the sights in New York. While in Brooklyn, the family get carjacked, and their case is assigned to detectives Jake Peralta & Amy Santiago of the 99 precinct.





	1. City Traffic

**Author's Note:**

> I have no idea where One Day At A Time is set. It could be set in New York, but as far as I know, they haven't confirmed where it's set. This is a story which assumes they don't live in NY.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jake asks Holt for a favor - the Alveraz's see New York in person for the first time.

"OK. I can do this. I can do this." Jake chanted to himself. Finally building up some nerve, he stood up and walked towards Holt's office.

"Give em hell, Jake." Charles added enthusiastically.

"Thank you, Charles." Jake replied. He could always count on Charles for encouragement. He knocked on the door and waited for Holt's response. Holt nodded, and Jake let himself in.

"Peralta, you knocked. That is the seventh time you have knocked on that door. The six previous times you knocked were because you required something from me. What do you need this time?" Holt asked blankly.

"Well, Inspector Sherlock, I'd like to ask a small favor." Jake started.

"There is no version of Sherlock Holmes where he is an Inspector." Holt corrected. When Holt corrected one of Jake's jokes, it usually meant he was in a good mood.

"Actually I was quoting Hot Fuzz. You probably haven't seen it." Jake corrected back. Holt seemed to intentionally go as blank as possible. Like he was trying to hide something. Jake gasped quietly. "Wait, have you seen Hot Fuzz?"

"You are getting off topic." Holt said quickly, avoiding the question. He has most definitely seen Hot Fuzz, Jake thought.

"Right. So, I was wondering if you could give me and Amy some smaller cases." Jake started. Holt said nothing. "You see, with the wedding coming up, we figured we could use as much time to ourselves as can get. I know it's a lot to ask, but-"

"OK." Holt answered.

"Wait, really?" Jake asked. He was expecting a lot more resistance than this.

"Of course. I know how important spending time with each other is in relationships. Remember when Kevin went to Paris? I missed him so much I left you in charge of my home." Holt explained.

"I kinda feel like the dig at me was unnecessary but thank you so much." Jake finished. He stood from his seat and left Holt's office. When Holt returned to his paperwork, Jake returned in a flash, leaning through the doorway. "What about Shaun of the Dead?"

"Return to work, Peralta." Holt ordered. He didn't even look up from his paperwork.

* * *

"Here we are, kids. New York City!" Penelope said, pointing towards New York out the window.

"You've been saying that since we saw New York from the plane." Alex complained.

"Well, we're here, ain't we?" she answered. The entire family watched the city come closer and closer as they crossed the bridge. As they came into the city, the awe started to fade. Alex sighed as the city itself didn't have nearly as much life as he expected. Lydia's disappointment was much more vocal.

"What a dump." she said. "Where is the colour?"

"Hey, this practically cost me an arm and a leg. No complaining about a lack of colour. Come on, guys. Show a bit more excitement." Penelope replied. Elena & Syd were the only two not disappointed by New York.

"Maybe it's just this part of New York. Manhattan is the big part of New York. This is just Brooklyn." Elena said, showing a bit of optimism.

"So we're not even in New York yet?" Lydia asked bitterly.

"No, we are. But New York has different sections. This is only one of them." Elena explained.

"Yeah, there's also Queens, Harlem, Hell's Kitchen. Just to name a few." Alex added.

"Wait, I get where you got Queens from, but how do you know about Harlem & Hell's Kitchen?" Elena asked.

"The Marvel/Netflix shows." Alex answered.

"There is a place called Hell's Kitchen?" Lydia asked with concern. She signed a cross and prayed silently.

"I can't believe you watch those shows." Elena commentated with a hint of disgust.

"No, those shows are really good." Syd jumped in. Elena and Alex were both taken by surprise. "Daredevil is about the corruption of the justice system. Jessica Jones is about a literally super strong woman fighting a personification of rape culture. Luke Cage has a bulletproof black lead. The Punisher deals with war induced PTSD."

"What about Iron Fist?" Elena asked, by now much more interested in these Marvel Netflix shows.

"That one is garbage." Syd said. Alex nodded in agreement.

"See?" Penelope said, smiling with glee. "This is what New York does. It brings people together."

*10 minutes later*

"Donde aprendiste a manejar gilipollas?!!" Penelope screamed at anyone in hearing distance. Elena and Syd were keeping their heads down. Alex starred dead ahead, not daring to look right or left and make eye contact with anyone his mother had yelled at.

"Like I said, this place is a dump." Lydia repeated. Penelope didn't seem to disagree this time.

"How long is this traffic going to go on?" Alex moaned. The lights went to green and they started moving again. But they weren't moving all that fast. Then Penelope almost cackled as she turned into a small road with no cars in sight.

"Uh, Mum, I'm not sure this is safe." Elena said. She would have edged to Syd for comfort if Alex wasn't sandwiched between them. Though Alex looked just as uneasy as she did.

"Elena, relax, Mum knows what she's doing." Penelope said comfortingly. However, a couple turns later, the family were met by a man in a mask - and he had a gun.

"Out of the car!" he yelled. Everyone in the family jumped out of the car as fast as they could. They stood back while the man jumped in the car and drove off. Everyone was in shock. Elena and Syd were holding each other. Penelope was holding Alex & Lydia.

"I will repeat: this city is a dump." Lydia said.


	2. Questioning

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jake and Amy are assigned the case of the Alvarez's. Elena does not hide her distaste of cops.

"So, what are you two planning this weekend? A fancy restaurant? A trip to Paris?" Charles asked. He finally had some spare time and walked over to Jake and Amy's desks. Only Jake turned from his work to acknowledge Charles. Amy had trained herself to ignore Boyle whenever he asked about their relationship.

"What on earth could we do in Paris in a day?" Jake asked sarcastically. "Look, we're not planning anything. We've got an empty couple of days to just chillax."

"But Amy hates not having a plan." Charles said. And with that, Amy had to be a part of the conversation.

"Usually, I do, but this wedding is going to need all my brain power and I'll need every cell up here well rested before we get to that." Amy explained. Much to Amy's relief, they heard Holt leave his office and head towards their desks.

"Peralta, Santiago. I have the perfect case for you two." Holt stated. He handed Jake a small folder. "Car jacking a few miles away. Victims were the Alvarez's. They are waiting downstairs. Should be a nice small case. I'll leave you to it."

"Thank you, sir." Jake said as Holt returned to his office. He read through the file to see the family's names. And two of them really caught his attention. They were so long they needed a smaller font just to fit on the paper. "Hey, look at those names. Those are enough names for like 4 separate people."

"Please do me a favor and don't ask them about that when we meet them." Amy pleaded cautiously.

"Yep, good call." Jake agreed.

* * *

"Can't we just go straight to the hotel?" Alex asked. Now that the shock from being carjacked had worn off, Alex was tired more than anything else. The officers of the precinct got on with their work, most of them not even passing a glance at the family. "We've been waiting for like an hour."

"It's been 10 minutes, Alex." Penelope corrected.

"What kind of detective do you think we'll get?" Syd asked.

"Probably some middle aged white guy who will go 'Hola' when he meets us." Elena remarked a bit louder than necessary.

"Uh, Elena, can you not talk about cops like that in a building filled with cops?" Alex asked quietly.

"It's not my fault the police are responsible for a lot of the discrimination & brutality that have been a part of this country since it's inception." Elena continued. That comment earned her a few judgemental glances.

"Hey, Elena, no more bad cop talk." Penelope hissed. Elena groaned. Penelope saw two detectives walking towards them. She got all the kids to stand up, while Lydia stood up in her own time.

"Hi. You must be the Alvarez's" the guy detective said. "I'm Detective Jake Peralta. This is Detective Amy Santiago."

Penelope shook their hands first. Lydia was quick shaking Jake's hand, but she held Amy's hand much more delicately.

"If my eyes are not mistaken, you are Cuban." she said. Amy smiled.

"Indeed I am." she replied.

"So only one of them is a middle aged white guy." Alex whispered to Elena, who elbowed him in response.

"¿hablas español?" Lydia asked.

"Sí. Padre insistió. Él se aseguró de ser fiel a mi herencia." Amy answered.

"Ya me gusta él." Lydia said.

"If you'll just come up with us, this should only take a few minutes." Amy said to the family. They followed her & Jake up the stairs, which led them to a pretty busy office space.

"Let's go to the break room." Jake suggested. In the break room was a pool table, a table with a few chairs, a vending machine, and a sofa by the window. The sofa drew the most attention because of the two large men sleeping on it: one of them with his shirt off.

"Oh come on." Amy remarked angrily. "Don't you two have paperwork to do?"

"Don't bother. No force in earth or heaven can wake them now." Jake said. None of the others could tell if he was joking. But from the look of them, they thought Jake had a point. Lydia, however, disagreed. She walked up to them and yelled. They woke with a start. Before they could process what happened, Lydia continued shouting.

"Get to work!!" she yelled. It did the trick. Hitchcock and Scully both left the break room without a word. Jake and Amy were both in awe.

"That was amazing." Jake exclaimed.

"Gracias." she replied, smiling with pride. A smile her family were very used to. With the break room now free, the Alvarez's sat opposite Jake and Amy, who opened their folder.

"OK. Can you describe the man who stole your car?" Amy asked. Jake held a pen to a piece of paper, listening closely.

"He had a hoodie on. White. Average height." Penelope described. "He had a mask on, so I couldn't see his face."

"What kind of mask?" Amy asked.

"It had a white skull on it." Penelope continued.

"Huh. That's the third carjacking this month where the perp had a white skull mask." Jake said curiously.

"You think this could be a gang?" Amy asked.

"Wait, are they gonna tear the car apart?" Penelope cut in, suddenly surrounding worried. "Oh god, I don't think that was covered in the insurance."

"Don't worry, we'll find the car." Jake said comfortingly.

"OK, you're all family apart from Syd. You are.." Amy started.

"MY FRIEND!" Elena yelled. Her whole family flinched. So did Jake & Amy. Even a few passing detectives outside the break room were caught off guard.

"... OK." Amy said awkwardly. "Syd, do we need to contact your parents at all?"

"I told them just afterwards. They say it's a learning experience I desperately need." Syd said.

"That's... a unique view on parenting." Jake commented. Elena looked concerned as well. "Do you have somewhere to stay? A hotel maybe?"

"Yes, we're staying in the Sheraton." Penelope answered.

"OK. If we need to bring you back in, we'll call you. If anything else comes to mind, just call us. Someone will pick up, and we'll be with you as quickly as we can. That's it. You can go." Amy explained. The family all stood up to leave the break room. Just before they left, Terry Jeffords entered. The entire family had a strong reaction to him.

"Damn" was Alex & Elena's response. Syd and Penelope both let their jaws drop.

"Señor ten piedad." Lydia exclaimed.

"This is Sergent Terry Jeffords." Jake introduced. Terry gave a friendly wave to the family, who waved back, still in awe of his impressive physique.

"I know you two want to relax ahead of your wedding, but it's my twins birthday this weekend. They'd love it if you two came." Terry asked.

"No problemo." Jake replied in a cartoonish Italian accent. The family gave him an odd look. Elena gave him a glare that would rival Rosa. "I feel like I did something wrong. Was it the problemo? I wanted to do something Spanish, but I drew a blank."

"You might want to stop talking, Jake." Terry suggested. Amy nodded. Jake seemed to force his lips together to stop himself from misspeaking again.

"Te estás casando con este esqueleto?" Lydia asked judgingly.


	3. New Holiday Plan

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Penelope insists that the family stay in the hotel room for the remainder of the holiday - Jake and Amy try to find something to do with their spare time.

"OK guys? Where are we going first?" Elena asked. The Alvarez's had been in their new hotel room for a few hours. Now that the shock of being carjacked had worn off entirely, Elena wanted to get the holiday back on track.

"Empire State Building. Come on, that's the main reason anyone comes to New York." Alex answered simply.

"OK, one vote for Empire State Building. Syd?" Elena continued.

"I'm fine with that. It's kind of romantic. We could look out onto the city holding each other." Syd agreed. Elena blushed at the mention of anything romantic. She was practically glowing when Syd suggested that.

"I'd like to change my vote." Alex said. "You two can go to the Empire State Building, I'll go somewhere where I don't have to see you two dorks try to be romantic."

"Excellent idea." Lydia said from the other room. She had been redoing her make up for about half an hour. "Let the weirdos be romantically weird together, and we will visit the most beautiful parts of New York. All 2 of them."

"Fine, fine." Elena conceded. Penelope came into the living room after a long shower. She seemed oblivious to the debate going on in the living room, so Elena had to stop her to get her attention. "So, Mum, care to accompany me and Syd to the Empire State Building?"

"What?" she asked, still a bit oblivious to the main topic of discussion.

"Well, that and the Statue of Liberty. Obviously." Elena added.

"Oh. No. No no no no no. No, no, no. You ain't going nowhere." Penelope shut Elena down hard. Alex was grinning at Elena's shock. "Neither are you, Joker."

"What? Why?" Alex asked, his grin gone as soon as it came.

"We are going to spend a nice, safe, fun, and most importantly, safe holiday right here." Penelope ordered.

"How?" Elena challenged.

"We'll watch movies. Come on, it's been so long since we all sat down to watch something together." Penelope responded quickly.

"None of us brought movies with us." Alex said.

"Why not?" Penelope asked.

"Because you ordered us to." he added.

"Yep, that I did." she admitted. After a moment of silent thinking, she snapped her fingers. "A board game then."

"All I found was a chess set with one queen, 3 knights, 2 pawns and a bunch of bishops to fill in the missing pieces. And I swear they are from like 10 different chess sets." Elena replied.

"Oh, chess isn't a good idea. Your grandmother takes chess way too seriously." Penelope warned quietly. The bathroom was quiet, which meant Lydia was very nearly finished.

"Hey, you suggested it, not me." Elena teased. Lydia emerged from the bathroom.

"I heard someone talking about chess." she said with a childish grin.

* * *

Meanwhile at Jake & Amy's apartment a few blocks away, Jake came into the bedroom to see Amy on her laptop.

"Hey, they picked up the Alvarez's car. Charles said they found some prints on the radio that might be from the carjacker." he informed Amy. "He thought he would outsmart us, but now we know his weakness. Music."

"Cool. Cool cool cool cool." Amy said. "Anyway, Jake. I have an idea for what we could do with our time off."

"Sure. What did you have in mind?"

"Well, my family have this get together every year. This year, it's my dad's turn to host the event. It's going to be all the Santiago's for one big party. There will be drinks, and tons of Cuban food, and dancing." Amy explained. "Mainly salsa dancing. It will be in a month, and my dad has insisted that I come this year."

"This year?"

"Well, I always had work whenever the get together was on." Amy said suspiciously quickly. "Do you think it's a bad idea?"

"No, no, that's great. A big Santiago get together. I've got to meet your family some time, right?" Jake replied. "I've just got to go down to the precinct to talk with Boyle about the fingerprints. Catch ya later, girl."

Jake was only half lying. He did go to the precinct, but it was to tell Boyle & Terry about the get together and ask for advice.

"A get together? Jake, this is the best news I've had all year." Boyle squeaked.

"Thanks, Charles. Still, is this bad timing? Should I wait till the wedding to meet the Santiago's?" Jake asked.

"Trust me man. You do not want to meet the family on the big day. I met Zeke on the wedding day and I thought he was super cool. Terry misjudged him badly." Terry answered.

"OK, good to know. But I've got another problem." Jake admitted. "Apparently, there's going to be a lot of salsa dancing. And if the Santiago's are as competitive as Amy can be, I really need to refresh my salsa skills. I would practice with Amy, but then she'd panic and make some excuse for us not to go so that I don't get humiliated in front of her family. Or maybe she'd accuse me of stereotyping her family and break off the marriage and then our relationship would be over forever."

"I think you're dangerously overthinking this." Terry cautioned. "Can't you pay for a salsa tutor?"

"We both know the answer to that." Jake answered. Jake never had enough spare money for anything.

"Wait, Jake, that family who got carjacked. Wasn't one of them a salsa tutor?" Charles suggested.

"Charles, you are the best." Jake exclaimed before dashing off.

"He.. he said it." Charles blurted. "He actually said it Terry. I can die happy."

"Dude, do you need some water?" Terry asked.

"Desperately." Charles replied.

* * *

"Checkmate again." Lydia exclaimed, cackling with glee. Elena had been beaten for the second time. She hadn't been beaten at chess once before, let alone twice in a row.

"Hold on, wasn't that bishop a castle?" Elena asked. There were so many bishops on the table it was impossible to keep track.

"No, it was clearly a knight. You might need your glasses checked." Lydia corrected, though Elena was convinced she was lying. Someone knocked on the door. Syd got up very quickly to get it. They opened the door to meet Jake.

"If you're here to take us to prison, I'm afraid we've beaten you to it." Syd joked. Jake laughed as Syd let him in. Penelope stood up and looked worried.

"Don't worry, nothing bad has happened." Jake said quickly. "We found the car not far from where you were carjacked. We also found some fingerprints in the car which don't match any of you guys, so that's a potential lead on the carjacker."

"What about the car?" Penelope asked.

"The car is fine. It's at the precinct." Jake clarified.

"Does that mean we can go out and see the sights now?" Alex asked. Lydia was still resetting the chess set, seemingly unaware of the conversation going on around her.

"Hey, zip it, papito." Penelope hissed.

"Anyway, I also came to ask: is one of you a salsa tutor?" Jake asked. Lydia abandoned the chess set and stood up gracefully.

"You have come to the right place." she announced.


	4. New Salsa Tutor

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jake tries to refresh his salsa dancing for the Santiago get together, but then Amy shows up to do the same - much to Lydia's delight.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'M BACK!! I wish I could say it was writer's block, but really, I've just been super lazy. So.... yeah, I'M BACK!!

"Again."

Again seemed to be Lydia's favorite word. That and various Spanish phrases which Jake assumed to be insults given Alex's grin whenever she said them. Jake knew he was rusty, so he knew not to wow her with his moves immediately. But he couldn't remember ever being this bad. And however much he told himself it was because the living room in this hotel was cramped as hell, he knew this was him. And Lydia knew it to.

"You said you were an experienced dancer." she said, clearly frustrated by the lack of progress.

"I am. I knew it was a mistake to buy new shoes, but apparently, $10 shoes from 5 years ago just aren't in good condition." Jake replied. Lydia quickly snapped her fingers to get his attention.

"This is not your shoes, this is your head." she corrected.

"What's wrong with my head?" Jake asked, sounding a bit offended.

"Far too much for me to count." Lydia answered. Jake didn't quite know how to respond to that. "Something in that head of yours is holding you back. Why did you come to me to learn salsa when you already know it?"

Jake took a moment of silence to gather his words.

"Because this is the first time I'm meeting Amy's family. We're getting married soon and.. I guess I feel like.. if I screw this up, then I won't be good enough for her. And if they think I'm not good enough for her, they might talk sense into-"

He didn't get to finish his explanation, because Lydia snapped him silent. Her fingers were powerful, no question.

"Enough. That is the problem. You cannot doubt yourself. Salsa is not something you think about. It comes from the heart. It is a deceleration of love, of passion, of desire. Does your heart work, Jacob Peralta?"

"In the same way computers from the 90's work, I guess so." Jake joked.

"Then take my hands. 5, 6, 7-." Lydia prepared. Before they could begin, there was a knock at the door. Jake and Lydia ignored it, Alex walked to the door and opened it. It was Amy Santiago, and she and Jake were very surprised to see each other.

"Jake?"

"Amy?"

"Why aren't you at the precinct?"

"I was. Why are you here?"

"To tell them we found the car. Or did you beat me to it?"

"Well.."

"SUFICIENTE!!" Lydia shouted. Jake and Amy quietened down fast. 

"OK." Amy started again. "I came here to... refresh my salsa dancing."

"But, we did the salsa on the cruise, and you were fine."

"Jake, that was years ago. And I took like 5 classes a week for a month ahead of that. Anyway... I really want this to be a good time. And I don't want to drag you down by being the one Cuban there who can't dance."

As Amy took a breath, Lydia stepped in.

"Take each other's hands." she ordered gently. Jake and Amy just starred at each other in confusion. "Now!"

They quickly held each other, ready to practice.

"Now then. Jacob. Amelia." Lydia started.

"Amy." she corrected.

"Amelia! You both love each other. Now, tell the other why you love them, with your bodies." Lydia continued. Jake started to say something, but Amy glared him to stay silent. She knew what he was going to say and she knew Lydia would not appreciate that kind of joke.

"Now then. 5, 6, 7, 8!" Lydia said, putting her salsa music on. Still looking nervous, Jake and Amy began to dance. They didn't need to look down, nor did the need to look around so they didn't bump into a table or a sofa, which Jake had been struggling with for a while. The nervous smiles turned to childish grins as they got more into the music. Without warning, Jake went to do a spin, and Amy did it almost flawlessly. As the music came to a close, Jake held her close. 

"That wasn't bad." Lydia said. "Again."

"Where's Elena and Syd?" Penelope yelled. Jake and Amy looked round to see Penelope run into the living room, looking absolutely livid. Alex and Lydia looked at Penelope with blank expressions. "Come on, one of you must know where they are."

"Maybe they went to see the sights." Alex suggested.

"Oh god, they're all alone in New York. We need to find them now!" Penelope blurted in a panic.

"Calm down, ma'am. Alex, call her and Syd." Jake suggested. As Alex took his phone out, Amy moved to Penelope to try and comfort her.

"Mrs. Alvarez, don't panic. Did they say where they wanted to go?"

"Uh, I think they said the Empire State Building. Oh god, what if they look over the edge and fall off?" Penelope continued panicking. Amy looked utterly helpless.

"I can't get a hold of Elena." Alex said. He tried Syd's number. "Or Syd."

"We've got to go out and find them." Penelope ordered. Jake and Amy clearly were not a mood to argue.

"OK, Amy, you go back to the precinct. I think Rosa and Terry are off duty. See if they can drive about. Penelope, do you mind if I call you Penelope, I know that's a bit informal, but-"

"GET TO THE POINT!" Penelope yelled.

"Right, missing kids, time is precious. We'll take my car and look for them. Let's go."


End file.
